Róż na dziurawe drogi

W sierpniu świat obiegła informacja o inicjatywnie, która powstała w Wielkiej Brytanii za przyczyną jednego z ubezpieczycieli (Sheilas’ Wheels). Ponieważ w badaniach zauważyli oni, że kobiety kierowcy giną w wypadkach powodowanych głównie przez mężczyzn, to w celu podwyższenia bezpieczeństwa może warto przygotować specjalne pasy ruchu. Dzięki temu płeć piękna w idyllicznym wyobrażeniu świata pomykałaby bezpiecznie, niczym jednorożce po tęczy. Kilka metrów obok, krwiożerczy mężczyźni mordowaliby się nawzajem walcząc o kawałek pasa drogowego.

Oczywiście ubezpieczycielowi chodziło o zwrócenie na siebie uwagi i zdobycie darmowego rozgłosu. Udało się na chwilę, po czym świat wrócił do normalnego funkcjonowania. Również w mojej głowie po prostu news przepadł gdy wzrok podczas prasówki zobaczył kolejną informację, tym razem pokazującą sportowych samochód. Po prostu zignorowałem kolejną głupotę serwowaną przez Internet.

Tymczasem jednak ziarno zostało zasiane i idea specjalnych pasów ruchu kiełkowała gdzieś w otchłaniach mojego umysłu. Wtem, kilka dni temu, jadąc lewym pasem za ciężarówką wyprzedzającą ciężarówkę

Specjalne pasy ruchu dla każdego to NAJGENIALNIEJSZY POMYSŁ od czasów wynalezienia autostrad bez ograniczeń prędkości.

Dlaczego? Bo powodują rozwój sieci dróg. Zmuszą one do wybudowania wielopasmowych autostrad, które będą podstawą do rewolucji, która powstała w mojej głowie.

Trzeba tylko odpowiednio przeprowadzić taką rewolucję.

Najpierw należy zalegalizować pasy dla każdej grupy społecznej, która chciałaby w Polsce być specjalnie traktowana. Wyłonienie grup można oddać politykom, bo (jak się okaże w następnym akapicie) i tak nie ważne, kto chce się komu przypodobać. W efekcie powstałyby specjalne kolorowe pasy dla wszystkich grup społecznych domagających się specjalnego trakowania. Swoje pasy mieliby np:

  • rolnicy (drogi brązowe niczym ziemia uprawna)
  • mundurowi (drogi np niebieskie niczym policyjne radiowozy),
  • górnicy (drogi czarne jak węgiel),
  • homoseksualiści (tutaj tęczowa droga byłaby niczym ślad po kocie Nyan).
    Do tego jeszcze po smutnym, szarym pasie dla szarych ludzi, zwykłych obywateli.

Na końcu należy te pasy ruchu zbudować. Po czym… zdelegalizować całą akcję ponieważ okaże się, że była niezgodna z Konstytucją.

W efekcie pozostaniemy z przynajmniej z pięcioma pasami ruchu w każdą stronę. Może nieco stylistyka tych dróg byłaby wątpliwej jakości ale czas oraz opony spowodują, że na końcu wszystko będzie szare.

Efekt: każdy będzie sobie pomykać drogami bez stresu. Ciężarówki wyprzedzające się na dwóch skrajnych pasach prawych. Jeżdżący wolniej niż trzeba zajmą środkowy pas. Przedostatni pas pozostanie dla wszystkich jadących normalnie, zaś skrajnie lewy dla tych, którym się wiecznie spieszy. Wszystkie grupy używające dróg pogodzone. Wszystko dzięki różowej rewolucji z UK.

rozowe_drogi_wielka_brytania_akcja
Wizualizacje z oficjalnej strony akcji pinkzones.com

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